How to install skirting boards (and how not to...)

Well, the skirting boards have been installed. More importantly, they haven't dropped off yet.

It was a learning curve. Here are my top tips:

•  Before you order excessively long skirting boards, you might want to measure your hallway so that you know they will actually fit through the door. 

•  REMEMBER that many skirting boards are double sided (Ogee and Torus) so don't have a little freak out that they don't match and go running out of your house shouting at the delivery guys as they're pulling away, ''They don't match!''  You'll just feel like an idiot when they point this out. 

•  Remember the double sidedness also when you're cutting and installing your boards. Unless you're going for an 'eclectic mismatched' look. (It's not going to fool anyone.)

Imperfect external corner... past caring at this point.

•  Internal corners for some reason are meant to be like this...

The first is attached as a butt joint. The second has the profile of the first drawn onto it and you cut along the line with a coping saw. I don't know why you can't do an internal mitre cut. Perhaps because rooms aren't square?

If you want to do it like a pro, have a little practise with the coping saw on an off cut to make sure you can do it.

•  Watch this guy...

He explains those strange corners far better than I ever could and makes it easy. It's also thoughtfully subtitled in case you don't speak Australian.

• If like me, you're going for primed MDF boards, wear a mask when you saw as it's toxic stuff. 

•  Get more adhesive than you think you need. If you don't you will run out half way through a board and have to scrape it all off. 

•  I thought it would be a good idea to have a join under a radiator as it wouldn't really be seen. Dumb move. I totally cocked it up and ended up with two joins. It's the first thing you see when you walk in the room as you don't put furniture in front of a radiator. Doh.

Disaster! And don't look at that shoddy radiator, I shall paint that too at some point.

•  Decorators caulk is your new best friend. It makes everything perfect. Or just perfect enough...

•  Primed boards mean there's no hurry to paint them all. This is a huge plus because you'll be so bored of them by the end of installation, you really won't want to paint them.

It took me a day and a half with a simple mitre saw and no power tools. I have no muscles so it was tough going. I also had to cut a conduit whilst it was attached to the wall, without damaging the cable that was inside it. I had to remove other bits of architrave round the door and the cupboard which was a real faff.

I'm really getting no enjoyment from my DIY at the moment. It's going okay, but not spectacularly good. The worst thing is, when I finish something, I just think I have to do it all again in two more rooms and the landing so it seems never ending and a little overwhelming. There's my whinge for the day.

As I say, I've lost interest in skirting boards and haven't painted them yet. I always find, the best thing to do when you're 98%  finished on a project is to start a newer, much more exciting one. With this in mind, I dragged my husband off to Travis Perkins where we argued about timber and eventually ordered five 3.9metre long scaffold boards. Yeah baby! They come on Thursday and I cannot wait. I will not be scaffolding with them.
Watch this space...

Oh and that desk tidy? It's also great for keeping your cats tidy...

Bad Bobby.